I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For

I woke up early this morning. Partly because my neck was hurting and partly because my mind was running. I do this fairly often. At 45 you begin wondering, "Have I really accomplished anything of significance? Have I made a difference in this world? Am I considered successful?"

I suppose many of these kinds of questions can be attributed to the natural developmental stages of any individual. Perhaps I'm more "normal" and prone to typical human patterns of behavior than I would like to admit.

There was a song running through my mind at about 3:45am. It was a line from a song by U2 that says, "But I still haven't found what I'm looking for." Obviously this begs the question, "So, Pruitt, what are you looking for?" The answer is fairly obvious, "If I knew what I was looking for I wouldnt' be asking the question!" Okay, that made me laugh!

To be really honest, simplistic and trite answers aren't cutting it for me these days. No, something deeper is nagging at me. It's a sense that time is running out. For the first time in my life I don't feel like I have my whole life in front of me. It's a sobering thought and an usettling feeling.

Time to pray.